I know that there were or are a couple of you who have made visits to my other blog. For a while there, even though I was posting in here, I did go back and posted a few more entries.
If you've gone there lately, I'm sure you got a message saying that the blog is private only. Please note that I did not make it private for anyone other than myself. I'm not posting there regularly and I'm not inviting only certain people to read the blog.
I just didn't want to delete it completely and I also didn't want it to be accessible to the public anymore. I want to keep it for myself because I'd like to revert to some of the posts from time to time. I mean, I did write in there for about three years. Would you throw away your journal or your diary? There were some posts there that were highly personal and emotional. And I remember writing them thinking nobody would read them. But then as shocking as it was, there were people actually responding. They were all kind-hearted and respectful responses from some very nice people. It was nice to have people on my side for once.
In the old days, those feelings were either locked-up or written down somewhere in a book for my own eyes only. I don't know whether putting myself out there for a select people made me weak or strong. Only you can answer that, hopefully truthfully.
I really do miss it though. Some of those people are now gone. I guess blogging was a thing they can either take or leave. There wasn't much attachments for them and they can move on to other things. Perhaps they grew and learned something and didn't need it anymore.
For me, it's still a forum for my thoughts which never get the audience they deserve sometimes. And honestly, I do get a kick out of people's responses. I'm happy whenever a comment is made. And I get very excited and I usually post a response to the comments.
Where else can it be all about me? The life I've lived where I always stood in the background and I was never the center of anything.
I'm a very anxious person which is why some of my posts seem to have been done in a hurry or look incomplete. Usually, when I'm writing about something outside of emotions and feelings, I get kind of anxious. But when I write about what I'm writing about now, I can actually blah blah all day long with details filled in. Though I do seem to branch out from one thing to another.
So I guess I should conclude. And in short, please don't be offended if you made way to my older blog to find that it is now private. If you really do want to access it - though I don't see why, let me know and I'll add you in. And for those that were there from 2004 and on, thanks for some memories and support and all that. It may be just "something" to you guys but for me, I think a lot of it was important for me.
Things have been emotionally crazy for me lately though. I'm getting all sorts of negative emotions flooding in yesterday, today and tomorrow. So you've been warned.
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6 comments:
Ahh... that explains it.
Oh V, I finally got Clan of Xymox's 'Breaking Point' after almost ten months! I'm still listening to it.
It's good stuff right? Right now, my favorite song from that album is "She's Dangerous." There's some really good parts in there instrumentally. The way the music builds up and the guitars come in.
I've read that they're releasing a new single. I have to check their site to see if their DVD is out yet.
I just went through it for the first time just now. I haven't got an impression yet. Let me return to you?
New single you say? I checked the website. You're right. Splendid!
I kind of figured why you did it.
I decided to stop posting, if possible, negative stuff. Sort of, making myself think positively in times of crisis.
Hey Kil, I try very hard to do that myself. But I just think there are times when it can't be avoided. Expressing some sort of anger and some despair can be helpful at times. A form of release to get you to move on.
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